My Mom

Hi all,

It’s been a while since I have written anything.
It’s ironic that not along ago I asked my mother what would happen to me when she eventually passed away.

Well, on June 11th, my mother asked me to take her to the hospital. This is unusual because my mom rarely wants to go to the hospital and for an almost 87 year old woman she has been healthy and independent.

She had to have surgery immediately for a blockage in her colon that turned out to be cancerous and spread to her lungs and liver. She went through the surgery well and is healing from it quickly. However, that will do nothing for the cancer that is at stage 4.

So our family makes sure that we are with her, helping her, loving her, and taking care of her 24 hours a day.

She returns to the oncologist on the 8th of August when we will see how fast the cancer is progressing. And there will be no chemo therapy or any other “remedy”. Surgery can’t remove the cancer and she does not want to go through the processes that will cause her the discomfort or agony of simply extending her life for a short amount of time.

This is shocking for all of us, but as my mother said, ” I will grow up.” And I discovered how much I am willing to do for my mother, how much I love her, and how much she means to me. I have also seen the vast amount of love my brothers and I have for each other during this challenging time.

Questions I Ask My Elderly Parents

” Mom, you’re 86 years old. What will I do when you pass away?”

“You’ll grow up.”

And even as I write I cry just at the thought of her being gone. I feel as if a huge part of me will die. All those years I spent with her will vanish. And all I’ll have are memories. I WON’T be the same. A part of my heart will be empty and lost.